Spice Girls show goes tits up
Spice Girls show "Viva Forever" has come to a close after producer, Judy Crayfish Revealed; "Theatre rules dictate there must be more people in the audience than on the stage for a show to continue....
View ArticleMichael Jackson appears before Jury
Michael Jackson appeared in court yesterday along with his many friends and supporters. The pop hero stood in the dock answering questions about his demise, at one point Judge Yvette Palazuelos had to...
View ArticleBen Affleck on parenting
Ben Affleck made the following statement today. Clever how he can do that. Raising kids is the greatest thing I could do,â¦â¦.. if I could find the little sods. You haven't seem them have you? They...
View ArticleTrump admits gargling with Formaldehyde
President Trump admitted, today, he often gargles with Formaldehyde in order to preserve his brain. He said that a leading brain surgeon from North Korea had given him the tip, during a conference call...
View ArticleLone Ranger and Tonto warned about lack of social distancing
The Trump administration has sent a formal warning to the 'way out west' duo, the Lone Ranger and Tonto, about thier blatant disregard for social distancing. In a Whitehouse statement, Mr Hank Worden...
View ArticleDorking East Parish Newsletter. (Covid-19) Edition.
Hello, one and all. Father Hacket here. It has been a trying time for everyone, hasn't it? The church hall hasn't been this quiet since Mr Fumble murdered Mr Lace at the 'Bring and Buy Sale'. I still...
View ArticleStock Market. Latest news Headlines
Able Paper and Card fold. Dynamo Elevators coming down. Texas Rifles C.E.O. fired. Blaines Construction cement new deal. Forte Hotels put financial troubles to bed. Strombone Machines on the slide....
View ArticleTourettes Sufferers Concerned
Mr Alan Pembole, chair of the United Kingdom Tourettes Council, has expressed concern over his clients not being able to shout and swear in the street. "It's really hard on my clients at the moment,...
View ArticleBoris Johnson admits gargling with formaldehyde
In an astounding double take, Boris Johnson has admitted gargling with formaldehyde in an attempt to keep up with Donald Trump. When asked, outside number 10 this morning, Mr Johnson replied;"It was on...
View ArticlePriti Patel backed by Boris Johnson
Boris Johnson has sworn to stand by Priti Patel amid allegations she bullied staff in several departments. Outside number 10, Mr Johnson was challenged about his ability to side step serious issues...
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